Dublin State of Mind

R investigating pebbles at Newgrange, outside of Dublin.

R investigating pebbles at Newgrange, outside of Dublin.

Nearly three months have passed since our pod surfaced in Dublin, Ireland, as part of our 4-month stint in London. Thanks to scheduled delays in the publishing world, however, some of my articles about the experience were just published this week.

The first story, for Four Seasons Hotels & Resorts’ “Have Family Will Travel” blog, spotlights the specific experiences the four of us had as guests of the Four Seasons Hotel Dublin.

The second piece, for the Expedia ViewFinder blog, is more a general look at Dublin for families.

Both stories feature text and photographs from yours truly. Both pieces include colorful references to the specific experiences the four of us had in Dublin—the first stop on our 10-day family vacation to Ireland.

It’s always a treat to have my work published, but these types of pieces are particularly fulfilling. For starters, they offer unique perspectives on our experiences in faraway places. Second, the posts give me the opportunity to mix anecdotes and narrative with service—a mash-up that, IMHO, is what makes travel writing fun. Finally, the articles appear on two of the blogs I respect most.

Anyway, to reiterate, you can read the pieces here and here. Enjoy! Spread the word! And please, keep reading.

What Young Kids Remember About Family Travel

Will L even remember tracing this ammonite?

Will L even remember tracing this ammonite?

For our family, travel is a mix of experiences, good and bad. We bond. We oooh. We aaah. We negotiate who sleeps where at bedtime. We fight over who gets to sit in the buggy. We weather meltdowns. And we never stop seeing new stuff.

Inevitably, however, Powerwoman and I ask ourselves: How much of all of these experiences will L and R remember?

It’s a question I’ve heard often—both from friends and foes. Those who share our commitment to family travel ask the (rhetorical) question in the context of how worthwhile the effort really is. Those who oppose it? They just blather on about how children only care about themselves, never the things they experience in the outside world.

This past week, on an assignment for a client (story coming soon!), I got to dig a little deeper into the issue during an interview with a child psychologist. And the answers shocked the hell out of me.

The expert, Dr. Michele Blume, basically said that, biologically speaking, kids don’t have the capacity for explicit memories until they reach 3 years old. She added that even after that, kids usually don’t retain more than “flashbulb memories” (memories of very brief snippets of an experience, individual moments) until after they turn 5.

Thankfully, before I nearly choked on my coffee at the notion that we’ve been going about it all wrong, Blume added that there’s more to memories than biology.

“What’s overlooked [in the case of kids and family travel] is the importance of implicit memory, the sensory experience,” said the psychologist, who is based in Hermosa Beach, Calif. “The sights, sounds, tastes and smells of being in a new place with mom and dad, interacting with the new environment and having fun as a family has an impact later on; affecting how they feel about themselves, how they feel about themselves in the world, their curiosity in new situations, and how they adapt to the world.”

Blume went on to say that far too many parents use family travel as a teaching experience—a situation that could overwhelm young kids. While sharing knowledge is important, she argues that moms and dads should make it a secondary aspect of a vacation, not the main event.

“Learning doesn’t have to be about the Eiffel Tower or something specific like that,” she noted. “When you ask them questions about what they’re seeing around them, it should be more about the experience of being there with mom and dad, together, and less about something [to which] they might not even be able to relate.”

Finally, Blume noted that the very best thing a parent can do for his or her child on a family trip is to make the new seem familiar.

“At a young age, children are learning about the world and how to regulate themselves in it,” she said. “Parents operate as an external modulator of their child’s nervous system. If parents can create constancy and predictability externally, then a child can take in the new environment because it seems safe to do that. Knowing your child and being attuned to [his or her] needs can go a long way to making [family travel] more fulfilling and enjoyable [for everyone involved].”

To what extent do you feel your kids have remembered family trips from their younger days?

Hope for Family Travelers on Planes

Kate. Photo by Shanell Mouland.

Kate.

The Internet has been abuzz this week with praise for a tear-jerking essay from Shanell Mouland, the woman behind Go Team Kate.

The story was titled, “Dear ‘Daddy’ in Seat 16C,” and was published Jan. 9. In it, Mouland recounts an anecdote from a recent flight with her 3-year-old daughter, Kate, who has autism. Details of the story are irrelevant here (honestly, I encourage you to gather some tissues and read the piece yourself). The bottom line: The dude who sat next to Kate was just a really good human being.

Over the course of the multi-hour flight, the guy smiled at the child. He engaged her. He let her touch his computer. He even played turtles with her. And at no point did he make it seem as if Kate or Shanell were annoying him or invading his personal space. He was just a good guy.

I loved the story for a number of reasons.

First, as a parent, it’s uplifting to hear about a stranger going out of his way to be kind to someone else’s kid. Second, as a supporter of the autism community (I’ve done work for AbilityPath), it’s wonderful to read about someone treating a child on the Spectrum with the kind of patience and respect these children deserve.

Finally, as a blogger, I love the bigger picture. At a time when airlines get kudos for segregating family travelers and passengers seem to enjoy ganging up on those of us who travel with kids, this story was a welcome breath of fresh air, a feel-good example of the reality that there still are some people who fly the “friendly” skies.

The piece left me feeling hopeful that maybe, just maybe, the prevailing attitudes about family travelers on airplanes can soften and change.

We just need more people like the Daddy in 16C. And we need to hear more stories like his.

Red Thumbs Up

Looks funny; packs a punch.

Looks funny; packs a punch.

No matter how many times I read the statistics about the dangers of distracted driving, no matter how many public service announcements I see and hear, I still occasionally am guilty of texting, status-updating, Tweeting and Instagramming behind the wheel of my moving vehicle.

It doesn’t happen often. And it rarely, if ever, happens at home. On the road, however, especially when I’m traveling with my family for work, sometimes I realize I’m that guy who’s staring into his phone with kids in the back seat.

And that’s never, ever OK.

This is precisely why I have embraced a new campaign out of Colorado to get parents to stop distracted driving once and for all. The program, dubbed “Red Thumb Reminder,” is the brainchild of an advertising executive at San Francisco-based Evolution Bureau. The premise is simple: Paint your thumbnail red so every time you pick up your phone while driving, all you see is a big red sign reminding you to STOP.

Steve Babcock, the man behind the campaign says on the program website that he was inspired by his daughter’s technique of tying a piece of yarn around her finger to remember something for school.

Whatever the inspiration, it works.

Maybe it’s the flash of red. Maybe it’s the notion of utilizing a slightly heavier thumb. Maybe it’s all in my head, I don’t know. The bottom line is that during the few hours I’ve spent with a red thumb on the wheel of my truck, I haven’t even had the URGE to pick up my Smartphone.

This campaign is great news for family travelers. Safety is the No. 1 issue on a road trip, and being mindful of avoiding distracted driving will keep us safer. Furthermore, the more we embrace this idea, the more we discuss the dangers of distracted driving with our kids, the more careful (we can hope) they will be when it’s their turn to get behind the wheel later in life.

Another benefit: The less distracted we are when we drive, the more focused we can be on the experience of the journey itself. From a family travel perspective, this is almost as important as being safe. Both are gifts worth protecting at all costs.

To get involved with the Red Thumb Reminder campaign, follow it on Twitter and like it on Facebook. (Just don’t follow or like on your phone while you’re driving, OK?)

Lessons from a Travel Etiquette Survey

What's worse at 30,000 feet: These, or bad parenting?

What’s worse at 30,000 feet: These, or bad parenting?

It’s no secret that I think most airlines could improve the way they treat family travelers. Still, some of the findings of a recent study published by Expedia (in the interest of full disclosure, a client) and Northstar have me bummed out.

This data, part of the 2013 Airplane Travel Etiquette Study, indicates that “inattentive parents” are the most offensive airplane etiquette violators in the skies today. A whopping 41 percent of 1,001 survey respondents tabbed slothful parents for the top spot. (Other offenders in the Top 5: rear-seat kickers, smelly passengers, drunkards and chatty Cathies.)

Do I agree that inattentive parents are a scourge in the skies? I do. But I also know that not all traveling parents are inattentive. The fact that these parents annoy other travelers SO MUCH puts the rest of us moms and dads in a bad spot. It makes us guilty by association—just because we fly with kids.

There’s a bigger problem here, too—the notion that lousy parents are THE WORST of the etiquette offenders.

Under-supervised kids are annoying in any setting, don’t get me wrong. But are they more annoying than rude grown-ups? Or sloppy drunks? Or people who won’t shut the heck up? Or people who clip their toenails in mid-flight? Or armrest hogs?

It concerns me that people think not. And it has me thinking about ways to change public perception.

One obvious solution is to call for parents to stop failing as parents when they board a plane. Another solution: To get fellow passengers to be more understanding with those of us who travel with our kids. Perhaps some sort of public awareness program could help; material about “practicing patience,” or something like that. (Seriously, y’all, who’s with me here?)

Of course I think the biggest change can come from the airlines themselves.

If these companies actually would enact policies that benefit family travelers instead of policies that alienate us, maybe thinking would change. If airlines would add perks for family travelers instead of taking perks away (man, I miss pre-boarding), maybe people would realize we are just like they.

At the end of the day, observing proper etiquette comes down to obeying a simple code of behavior. The best place to change perception in relation to this behavior is at the top.

Family Travelers to FAA: It’s About F-ing Time

Thankfully, R doesn't need a device to be happy in flight.

Thankfully, R doesn’t need a device to be happy in flight.

Sure, business travelers will insist that they benefit most from the FAA’s announcement today to allow the use of most electronic devices. They’ll say they now can work uninterrupted from the moment they sit down on the plane. That productivity will increase.

In my book, nobody wins more than moms and dads who travel with young kids.

If you’ve ever flown with your little ones, you know that the most difficult parts of every flight with youngsters are the take-off and landing—the parts of the flight that wreak havoc on tiny eardrums. These are the 20 minutes (10 on the front end, 10 on the back end) when electronic devices previously had been banned.

In our family, we have referred to these periods as the “Quiet Zones.” Fittingly, on last week’s flight home from Ireland, L and I had a pointed conversation about why we passengers couldn’t use devices during those stretches. The conversation went something like this.

L: “Daddy, can we please read a Kindle book?”
Me: “We can, honey, but we have to wait until the plane takes off and gets to a certain point in the sky.”
L: “Why?”
Me: “Well, because that’s what the pilot says.”
L: “But why?”
Me: “Because.”
L: “WHY?”
Me: “To be completely honest, honey, I don’t know. The pilot says that’s the way it is on his plane, so we have to follow the rules.”
L: “The pilot’s rules are stupid, Daddy.”

She was right, of course. I’ve always thought the rules were stupid, too.

Now, thankfully, we parents can pull out all the stops to distract our traveling partners. Kindle books. Smartphone games (like this one). Digital doodlers. Even the iPads.

So, from the bottom of my heart, thanks to you, Federal Aviation Administration, for finally ending one of the dumbest and senseless in-flight policies in recent memory. It’s a great day for us family travelers (and all travelers, for that matter). And it’s about f-ing time.

Wandering Pod on Four Seasons Blog, Again

Three pix from our trip to the Isle of Dogs.

Three pix from our trip to the Isle of Dogs.

Another month, another featured post for yours truly on Have Family Will Travel, the kick-ass family travel blog from Four Seasons Hotels & Resorts.

My latest piece spotlighted our pod’s three-day visit to the Four Seasons Hotel London at Canary Wharf. We stayed there for the first three days of our current London adventure; the story was published this past weekend.

Regular readers of this blog will recognize some of the pictures and anecdotes immediately; snippets from the story were published here first. Taken as a whole, however, the post represents the first comprehensive account of that portion of our visit. (The story also is the first formal article I’ve published about our stay in London, and the first time many of the photos have been published outside of my personal Facebook page.)

My next trip on behalf of Four Seasons begins later this week—we’re headed to the Four Seasons Hotel Dublin, then renting a cottage on the West Coast of Ireland for a week of quietude. We’ll be unplugged (seriously) for the latter part of the adventure, but stay tuned for updates from the Big City on the front and back ends.

In the meantime, please feel free to read some of my previous posts for the HFWT blog; you can find the local links to them here and here.

Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Kids’ Passports (But Were Afraid To Ask)

Don't mess around.

Don’t mess around.

My debut article in Scholastic Parent & Child magazine hit newsstands this week. The subject: Kids’ passports, and everything you ought to know to prepare for taking your little ones abroad.

The story, titled, “A Parent’s Guide to Passports for Kids,” offers advice on everything from custody issues to renewal timing. It hinges on the expertise and insights of Brenda Sprague, the U.S. State Department’s deputy assistant secretary for passport services. It also includes a few anecdotes from some family travelers I know (and respect).

The story even includes a bunch of helpful links.

If you never have traveled abroad with your baby or toddler, consider the piece a must-read; if you travel regularly with the youngsters, please use the piece as a CliffsNotes-style refresher course.

Also, if you feel I’ve left out anything important, feel free to add tips in the comment field below.

Most important, please don’t think this is advice you can ignore or follow selectively. Few international travel stresses are more acute than those involving your kids. Take it from someone who has learned a few of these lessons the hard way.

Supporting Cancer Research Through Travel

Donate to support cancer research and you can party like a rock star here.

Donate to support cancer research and you can party like a rock star here.

I’m proud to call Expedia one of my biggest clients (I contribute to their Expedia Viewfinder blog), and to celebrate Childhood Cancer Awareness Month, Expedia has joined forces with St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital in Memphis, giving everyone a chance to donate to a great cause and take a trip of a lifetime.

As part of this promotion, Expedia is giving away 150 trips, including 30 big “Dream Trips” each day for the month of September.

Giveaways last all month, and a new Dream Trip will be showcased each day. To support this effort, my colleagues at Expedia have rallied a bunch of expert family travelers across the country to feature their favorite Dream Trips Giveaways in the Well-Traveled Families for St. Jude Blog Carnival.

Expedia announced the program on the Expedia Viewfinder blog earlier this week. Then, my colleague, Anne Taylor Hartzell (a.k.a. the Hip Travel Mama), kicked things off yesterday with a post about a giveaway to the Fairmont Kea Lani resort in Maui, Hawaii. Today, I’m excited to feature a Dream Trip to Las Vegas, one of my favorite destinations on Earth.

The trip, titled “Experience Las Vegas Like a Rock Star,” revolves around a stay at Aria Resort & Casino. Here are the details:

  • Round-trip air tickets for two (on Spirit Airlines)
  • A three-night stay at Aria Resort & Casino
  • A “Vegas Rock Star” club crawl (which enables you to skip the lines at popular clubs and travel the Strip in a party bus)
  • Maverick “flight-seeing” helicopter adventure for two
  • Two free tickets to Zarkana by Cirque du Soleil
  • A limousine tour of Vegas highlights
  • A $500 Visa gift card.

All told, the estimated value of this package is more than $3,000; it (or any of the other Dream Trips) can be yours for a suggested $5 minimum donation. DONATE NOW for an opportunity to win this trip (and see Expedia for official rules). And, hey, if you donate $25 or more, you can get a coupon for 20 percent off future hotel bookings on Expedia’s mobile app or 10 percent off purchases on Expedia.com.

To reiterate, ALL DONATIONS GO DIRECTLY TO ST. JUDE. That means all donations will help kids who have cancer. I can’t think of a better cause to support.

Wandering Pod Featured on Luxury Hotel Blog

Peering at a donkey inside Centreville Amusement Park.

Animal-watching at Centreville Amusement Park.

What’s the most family-friendly destination in Toronto? According to my recent blog post for “Have Family Will Travel,” the family travel blog from Four Seasons Hotels and Resorts, it’s Centre Island, one of the barrier islands smack in the middle of the city’s harbor.

The story, titled, “Family Day Trip for Dad: Toronto’s Centre Island,” was published on the blog last week.

It chronicles a recent visit with an “adopted” pod—a friend, her sister, and the sister’s two kids.

Without question, the undisputed highpoint of the experience (and of the story) was our time at Centreville Amusement Park, an expansive amusement park. Here, the lot of us spent hours riding rides, playing games on the arcade, splashing around in puddles (it rained while we were there) and petting animals at the on-site petting farm.

Another fun part of the trip: The ferry ride (in a 70-year-old ferry) from Toronto’s waterfront out to the island itself.

All told, our fun-loving jaunt to Centre Island was a spectacular (and family-friendly) way to spend a day in Toronto. I can’t wait to bring my own kids next time.