Tag Archive for: road trip

The yin and yang of family travel

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Outside The Ahwahnee, right after we arrived.

Outside The Ahwahnee, right after we arrived.

Five days have passed since our family excursion to Yosemite National Park and The Ahwahnee Hotel. Though the trip was, by its very nature, a dream come true, the adventure included stratospheric highs and horrendous lows.

Chronicling the highpoints is easy. On the list: Watching the girls seek “cozy hideaways” for fairies as we hiked amid granite boulders on the way to Mirror Lake, hearing the kids sing songs from “Frozen” as Little R experienced snow for the first time in her life, taking them to the Curry Village Pizza Deck, helping L put her hands and face in the Merced River to see what it felt like, and, of course, spotting a bobcat slink by less than five feet away.

Of course watching my girls watch Yosemite Falls also was pretty amazing—the baby could not get over the fact that the waterfall never “shut off.”

The lowpoints are just as easy to enumerate.

Like the mid-brunch tantrum on the last morning that featured L scratching her mother like that aforementioned bobcat. Or R’s insistence on being carried for the duration of a 3-mile hike.

Both of these experiences paled in comparison to the indisputable nadir: The night when my 2-year-old daughter kicked me out of the bed we were sharing and screamed like a banshee until I agreed to sleep on the floor.

(At first this scene amused me; then I realized I was paying close to $500 a night to camp in a hotel.)

Personally, I expected the trip to have a little yin and yang—this is what happens when you travel with two humans under the age of 6. Still, I’d be lying if I told you I wasn’t at least a little surprised by just how much yang there was on this particular adventure, especially considering how well the kids did on our last major adventure in London.

Overall, the experience was a perfect reminder of what family travel really is—beautiful, frustrating, exhilarating, and exhausting. Yes, there were low points. But there also were high points, and all it takes is one of those to make a memory that can last a lifetime for any of us.

All about the storybook(s)

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Inside spread, Alaska Airlines magazine

This is shaping up to be the biggest week of the year for those of us here at Wandering Pod, and it’s all about the placements.

First, on Tuesday, the April 2014 issue of Alaska Airlines magazine hit seat-backs with a cover story written by yours truly. The story, which runs nearly 4,000 words, spotlights family travel in Hawaii. In it, I pulled together anecdotes and experiences from five years of visiting the Aloha State with (at least one of) the girls.

Check it out by clicking here (and then scrolling to page 34, where the piece begins).

Next, later this morning, Powerwoman, L, R, and I will hop in the Prius and head out to Yosemite National Park, where we’ll spend the next four days disconnecting from the world and exploring as a family.

This trip is part of a HUGE package of articles I’ll be writing for Expedia’s Expedia Viewfinder blog. The effort is in conjunction with Expedia’s new “Find Your Storybook” advertising campaign; during the promotion, each Viewfinder will create content about a dream trip.

The first of *my* storybook stories is slated to run on the Expedia Viewfinder later this month. I’ll be creating oodles of content for this site, too. Stay tuned!

The things they carry (on family trips)

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Just some of the stuff we'll be bringing to Yosemite.

Just some of the stuff we’ll be bringing to Yosemite.

When you leave home on an extended trip, you never know when you’re going to want to have a tin pencil case in the shape of a mummy. Or when you might need that unwrapped green straw from Starbucks. Or when you’ll be looking for a ladybug eraser.

But if you’re one of my kids, you bring these items anyway. Just in case.

Yes, as we pack up for this week’s family vacation to Yosemite National Park, the girls have opted for some unusual items to bring along for the ride.

The mummy tin, green straw (??!!??), and ladybug eraser are only highlights. Also in the gyre of ridiculousness they plan to take: A die-cast double-decker bus, a Lego rectangle, a plastic Cinderella amulet (which sings when you depress the center), a bunch of bow-shaped hairclips, two pieces of wooden model railroad track (but, peculiarly, no trains), a Candyland game piece, a ball-pit ball, and old t-shirts that are way too small (apparently these will serves as “nightgowns” when the stuffed kitties get cold at night).

Powerwoman and I don’t really understand why the girls want to bring all of these tchotchkes—not one bit. At the same time, we recognize the familiarity our kids have with each of these items, and respect the notion of bringing some of those familiar goodies along for a trip to somewhere new.

Sure, travel is exciting. But for little ones, it also must be scary (to a point). We’re in favor of anything the girls can do to make the experience more comfortable.

And if we need to invoke ancient Egypt along the way, we’re covered. Thank goodness.

What silly/ridiculous totems do your kids insist on bringing for family vacations?

Family travel experts who start young

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Next week, we'll be here.

Next week, we’ll be here.

As Powerwoman and I make final preparations for next week’s road trip from our home in Northern California to Yosemite National Park, we’ve come up against a rather opinionated family travel expert: our own 4-year-old.

Apparently, since L has amassed multitudes of experience on the road, she has developed firm particulars about what she will and will not accept during a long haul in the car.

On the whitelist: Taylor Swift music, goldfish crackers, Etch-a-Sketch, and playground stops.

On the blacklist: Naps, male singers (including Mumford & Sons, unfortunately), uninterrupted drive times of more than two hours, and carrot sticks.

Our daughter also has shared deep thoughts about hotels over the last few weeks, seemingly in the hopes that we will base our planning decisions on her wants and likes (we won’t; we’re staying here). Some of the more notable statements: 1) Hotel rooms with extra space are better because that way the two sisters can run around “like maniacs,” 2) Sometimes the “toilet seats in hotel bathrooms are too big,” and 3) It is annoying when Daddy has to spend time talking to his “friends” who run hotels.

Yes, these statements are completely ridiculous (especially No. 2). But they’re also true. And they’ve led Powerwoman and me to marvel at how insightful our jet-setting preschooler has become in her short time with a frequent flier number.

We’re not the only parents to marvel at this type of precociousness.

Friend and fellow travel blogger Katie Wood Dillon, a.k.a., La Jolla Mom, recently posted on Facebook about a similar experience with her 6-year-old. With Katie’s permission, here’s the snip:

“I just had the option to upgrade/re-route our mileage flights so thought I’d run the options by [my daughter]. She rejected international first class (!!!) on American Airlines for business class on Japan Airlines citing cold green tea, Pac-Man on the inflight entertainment and beef curry at the Narita lounge. In the same breath, she stated that American Airlines planes smell worse and that she’ll do anything to avoid flying a regional jet unless we’re going to Hong Kong on Cathay Pacific which is the best airline ever. At 6-years-old, all of this is so incredibly accurate that I can almost not handle it.”

When did these little humans become so smart? When did they become so perceptive? Are the ins and outs of travel THAT obvious? Most important: What else can our kids teach us about the vagaries and eccentricities and realities of travel we have come to accept as normal?

I’m not sure I know the answer to any of these questions. But I sure as heck am going to turn to the family’s newest travel expert to try and figure things out.

Why You Should Travel with Preschoolers

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Little R, enjoying downtime in London.

Little R, enjoying downtime in London.

It’s been a busy few weeks here at Wandering Pod headquarters. First we surfaced for another story on the “Have Family Will Travel” blog from Four Seasons. Then, earlier today, we hit the Google Alerts again, this time with a service piece for Scholastic Parent & Child magazine.

The latter story, titled, “Sanity-Saving Tips for Traveling with Preschoolers,” presents eight reasons why parents *should* travel with their kids when their kids are between the ages of 3-5. Some of my tips: Kids actually will remember it, flying with kids is easier than you think, luxury hotels are doing nice stuff for families, and public transportation is your friend.

Originally, the goal of the story was to give parents who are hesitant to travel with their preschoolers reasons to put their minds at ease.

Along the way, however, I learned a lot, too.

This was the story that led me to Michelle Blume, a child psychologist who blew my mind with some of the data she shared about how much 3- and 4-year-olds actually remember. It also was the piece that enabled me to meet Raquel Anderson, a behavioral health specialist affiliated with Bundoo, a great reference site for parents.

For both of these reasons, I’m excited to share the piece. Hope you enjoy!

What’s in a Name?

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Didi Dragonfly Weath-Weath, running like a maniac.

Didi Dragonfly Weath-Weath, running like a maniac.

We’ve been taking a lot of road trips lately, and L and R have come up with a fun new game for the occasions.

The premise of this exercise is simple: The morning of a big drive, we each pick new identities to assume for the duration of our trip. From that point forward—at least until we reach our destination—we must refer to each other by these assumed names and personas.

Not surprisingly, because our girls are, well, girls, most of the alter egos revolve around princesses.

This weekend, for instance, on a drive from our home north of San Francisco to see friends who live south of the city, L declared she was “Princess Tulip,” while R assumed the name, “Didi Dragonfly Weath-Weath.” On a separate road trip, to see a fish hatchery nearby, L was “Princess Sunny” and R was “Princess Boomer.”

(In case you’re wondering, for both instances Powerwoman was “Princess Ladybug” and I was “Balaenoptera Dadificus,” or “B.D.,” for short.)

Generally speaking, the name game is a great exercise in creatively passing time.

For starters, it inspires the girls to draw pictures of who they’ve just become—these art sessions usually take place at the breakfast table, while Powerwoman and I furiously dash around to pack up snacks and load the car.

En route, the game also is a great conversation starter; we encourage both girls to tell us stories about their characters. (Often, they tell the stories simultaneously. Go figure.)

Still, the exercise has its drawbacks.

L is incredibly serious about all of us calling each other by the assumed names, and forgetting to do so can really piss her off. What’s more, even though I’m the only male human in the family, apparently I’m not allowed to pick a “Prince” name because there’s only one prince in the family, and that’s our cat (the girls call him, “Prince Coomer”).

These negatives are minuscule. The Name Game is a great (kid-driven) activity for road trips, and I recommend it without reservation. And if you’re worried about forgetting the names in your family (or if your family is bigger than ours), there’s always the option of name tags.

What are some of your favorite ways to pass time on a family road trip?

What Young Kids Remember About Family Travel

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Will L even remember tracing this ammonite?

Will L even remember tracing this ammonite?

For our family, travel is a mix of experiences, good and bad. We bond. We oooh. We aaah. We negotiate who sleeps where at bedtime. We fight over who gets to sit in the buggy. We weather meltdowns. And we never stop seeing new stuff.

Inevitably, however, Powerwoman and I ask ourselves: How much of all of these experiences will L and R remember?

It’s a question I’ve heard often—both from friends and foes. Those who share our commitment to family travel ask the (rhetorical) question in the context of how worthwhile the effort really is. Those who oppose it? They just blather on about how children only care about themselves, never the things they experience in the outside world.

This past week, on an assignment for a client (story coming soon!), I got to dig a little deeper into the issue during an interview with a child psychologist. And the answers shocked the hell out of me.

The expert, Dr. Michele Blume, basically said that, biologically speaking, kids don’t have the capacity for explicit memories until they reach 3 years old. She added that even after that, kids usually don’t retain more than “flashbulb memories” (memories of very brief snippets of an experience, individual moments) until after they turn 5.

Thankfully, before I nearly choked on my coffee at the notion that we’ve been going about it all wrong, Blume added that there’s more to memories than biology.

“What’s overlooked [in the case of kids and family travel] is the importance of implicit memory, the sensory experience,” said the psychologist, who is based in Hermosa Beach, Calif. “The sights, sounds, tastes and smells of being in a new place with mom and dad, interacting with the new environment and having fun as a family has an impact later on; affecting how they feel about themselves, how they feel about themselves in the world, their curiosity in new situations, and how they adapt to the world.”

Blume went on to say that far too many parents use family travel as a teaching experience—a situation that could overwhelm young kids. While sharing knowledge is important, she argues that moms and dads should make it a secondary aspect of a vacation, not the main event.

“Learning doesn’t have to be about the Eiffel Tower or something specific like that,” she noted. “When you ask them questions about what they’re seeing around them, it should be more about the experience of being there with mom and dad, together, and less about something [to which] they might not even be able to relate.”

Finally, Blume noted that the very best thing a parent can do for his or her child on a family trip is to make the new seem familiar.

“At a young age, children are learning about the world and how to regulate themselves in it,” she said. “Parents operate as an external modulator of their child’s nervous system. If parents can create constancy and predictability externally, then a child can take in the new environment because it seems safe to do that. Knowing your child and being attuned to [his or her] needs can go a long way to making [family travel] more fulfilling and enjoyable [for everyone involved].”

To what extent do you feel your kids have remembered family trips from their younger days?

Bitten by the Bug

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The Villano Family: Coming to a hillside near you.

The Villano Family: Coming to a hillside near you.

My friends warned me. They told me that after spending four months living with my family in London, I’d come back yearning to get the kids out on the road again ASAP. They joked that we’d all catch “the [travel] bug” and return to Wine Country, only to liquidate our assets and start a nomadic life.

Heck, one buddy bet me we’d never actually come home.

While I’m proud to announce that the gambling friend lost, the other predictions haven’t been too far afield. And the fallout has caught this family travel blogger by surprise.

Things developed rapidly over the last few weeks. The day after we got home (Christmas Eve day), my wife and I swore we’d keep our girls in one place for a while. We informed the girls of our decision and they seemed to be on board. L, our older daughter, went so far as to declare that she did not want to step foot in an airplane for “at least a few months, or ever again, unless it was a plane that went somewhere cool.” R, the younger sister, agreed in her own way, stating that airplanes were loud and her ears didn’t want to hear them again for a while.

We held these beliefs for at least a week. Then, just about the moment we were completely unpacked, everyone’s perspective began to change. During a session building Legos, I told the girls about the Legoland Hotel and they insisted we book a trip. Then we started looking at flights for a trip to Texas. And we discussed a trip to Walt Disney World. And we started planning a trip to Lanai.

These were just the family trips. At the same time, we grown-ups were making plans of our own.

Powerwoman started planning a solo trip to help her best friend shop for a wedding dress. I lined up work trips to Los Angeles, Seattle, Las Vegas, and San Diego, to name a few. Then my wife and I recruited the grandparents to watch the girls so we could fly back to New York.

In a span of two weeks, we Villanos went from a policy of “No New Trips” to booking nearly 10 of them. And I’m sure there’ll be more.

No, we’re not planning on selling the house and hitting the road for good (though there is a high likelihood we’ll take an RV to Yosemite National Park this spring). But we *did* catch the family travel fever, and especially while our girls are still young, it’s a wonderful affliction to have.

How quickly after a big family trip do you plan your next escape?

Red Thumbs Up

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Looks funny; packs a punch.

Looks funny; packs a punch.

No matter how many times I read the statistics about the dangers of distracted driving, no matter how many public service announcements I see and hear, I still occasionally am guilty of texting, status-updating, Tweeting and Instagramming behind the wheel of my moving vehicle.

It doesn’t happen often. And it rarely, if ever, happens at home. On the road, however, especially when I’m traveling with my family for work, sometimes I realize I’m that guy who’s staring into his phone with kids in the back seat.

And that’s never, ever OK.

This is precisely why I have embraced a new campaign out of Colorado to get parents to stop distracted driving once and for all. The program, dubbed “Red Thumb Reminder,” is the brainchild of an advertising executive at San Francisco-based Evolution Bureau. The premise is simple: Paint your thumbnail red so every time you pick up your phone while driving, all you see is a big red sign reminding you to STOP.

Steve Babcock, the man behind the campaign says on the program website that he was inspired by his daughter’s technique of tying a piece of yarn around her finger to remember something for school.

Whatever the inspiration, it works.

Maybe it’s the flash of red. Maybe it’s the notion of utilizing a slightly heavier thumb. Maybe it’s all in my head, I don’t know. The bottom line is that during the few hours I’ve spent with a red thumb on the wheel of my truck, I haven’t even had the URGE to pick up my Smartphone.

This campaign is great news for family travelers. Safety is the No. 1 issue on a road trip, and being mindful of avoiding distracted driving will keep us safer. Furthermore, the more we embrace this idea, the more we discuss the dangers of distracted driving with our kids, the more careful (we can hope) they will be when it’s their turn to get behind the wheel later in life.

Another benefit: The less distracted we are when we drive, the more focused we can be on the experience of the journey itself. From a family travel perspective, this is almost as important as being safe. Both are gifts worth protecting at all costs.

To get involved with the Red Thumb Reminder campaign, follow it on Twitter and like it on Facebook. (Just don’t follow or like on your phone while you’re driving, OK?)

An Ode to Solo-Parent Family Travelers

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Happy times, with a tree llama.

Happy times, with a tree llama.

After two-thirds of a mommy-free, 3-day road-trip with my girls, I can tell you this: Solo-parent family travel is a LOT harder than I ever thought it would be.

In my abbreviated experience, challenges generally come in two main flavors: Kid-time and alone-time.

The ones during kid time should come as no surprise. Meals are tough because you’ve got no help to feed or discipline or disrobe crayons or put together a puzzle or cut grilled cheese or chase down that piece of fried fish one of the children just threw across the room. Bedtimes can be rough when the kids are on different schedules and there’s only one parent to wipe butts and brush teeth and read books and sing songs and snuggle.

Alone time presents its own obstacles. Because there’s nobody else to watch the kids for even a moment, you find yourself Instagramming and scribbling story notes while adjudicating a game of “Go Fish,” eating dinner (of unclaimed pasta with butter sauce, natch) at 5 p.m., and engaging in training “runs” of four miles (in circles) around the living room of your rental cabin.

(Yes, I really did that last one. I know: I am a complete and total freak.)

Months from now, I’ll look back on this experience with my girls as difficult but fun. Heck, next week I plan to write about some of the amazing stuff we have done over the last 48 hours.

Right now, however, crashed out on a couch while the gals snooze away in the other room, I see the takeaway as more visceral: nobody—I mean, nobody—deserves more credit in the world of parenting than single moms and dads who vacation with multiple children multiple times a year.

For these parents, solo-parent vacations aren’t a choice.  For these parents, help rarely is even an option. For these parents, this rigmarole is reality, on every single trip.

In my book—especially tonight—that makes them rock stars; parents from whom I’ve got a ton to learn.